Day 2: The Ninja Meets his Battle

January 05, 2012

Day 2: The Ninja Meets his Battle

UPDATE DAY 3 EARLY AM:

2 DONORS FOR PACK RBC PASSED
1 DONOR FOR PLATELETS (CONSIDERED BUT TO BE RECHECKED BECAUSE OF LOW HEMOGLOBIN DURING SCREENING)

For the platelet donor, we need MALE donors with O- blood type and who have BIG veins. Donor has to be PHYSICALLY PRESENT during transfusion as procedure will be done here.

For pack RBC, we might be needing more so for those asking outside Cebu, it is suggested that if you are sure you have O- blood, you can donate at your local Philippine National Red Cross (PNRC) chapter and have them coordinate with Cebu Red Cross, number is 2539793. For PNRC chapters, here is the complete list: http://www.redcross.org.ph/chapters. Why Red Cross? Because I'm sure we are not the only ones needing this type of blood. Lito is a priority already in PNRC Cebu. If you are about to donate in PNRC, let me know right away so I can alert PNRC Cebu. Storage and province-to-province transfer details might be coordinated with me and PNRC but I'm not sure yet how this goes.

THANK YOU!

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Day 2 Major Update as of 11:00PM, January 5, 2012

7 screened donors since last night.

2- passed
2- failed, low hemoglobin count
1- blood type incompatible

2- mismatch

This is my first batch. I am currently calling my 2nd batch.

We need at least 6 donors, 3 of them will be donors for pack RBC and 3 for platelets. Apparently, we have two major concerns:

1. This blood type is very rare and

2. Not all will pass the screening process.

For the meantime, I am prioritizing those who are readily available and willing. And I'm categorizing them by batch. If I haven't called today, more or less I'll call soon. Again, thank you so much.

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Today’s emotional weather update: Gloomy.

The results were as gloomy as the skies. I was happy because 1 passed (Lito’s bro, Stanly) but we are so far yet from the 6 so I had to double time and call those on my 2^nd batch (scheduled tomorrow and Saturday). Manila institutions do not have stock O- blood as well. We have our angels there who are helping us. Same goes with other provinces and institutions suggested by friends here. So for our screened donors, I fervently pray that they will pass because once Lito’s WBC count goes down due to chemo and there would not be enough blood donors, it would really be a big problem.

The heavens are so gloomy today and rain falls slowly as I walk towards Red Cross to give them the blood letter request, that form that indicates what kind of blood component we need, that form that clearly states Lito’s AML, that form that might save us. They don’t have the O- blood type yet but will be calling me once there is.

I walked back towards Chong Hua as if in a trance. I know it’s our second day here but it seems like such a long time. When you’re walking alone with your thoughts, it brings you to a lot of questions, wonderings, anxieties, fear. I had these thoughts crossing my mind and I was so occupied that I didn’t realize I was in tears already and I was back at the hospital. If I felt this when I’m alone with my thoughts, how much more with him?

I hate to leave my ninja a lot but I had to because I had to attend to screenings and meet-ups and sending off blood letter requests to institutions. It pains me to leave him behind, knowing he’s alone when I go, knowing he's not allowed to have visitors. Knowing Lito who's so talkative and lights up when he's with people, being alone is a new thing to him. His IV has been set already so he’s not as free to roam around the room as easily as he could. He said he could still do cartwheels but well, good luck on that paree.

I returned with a gloomy ninja who’s eating alone. His ninja mask is still on but the red puffy eyes behind the mask cannot be left unnoticed. He told me he cried earlier when he was alone. It was the time that he was also thinking a lot of things. And in the middle of all those thoughts, reality slapped him hard in the face—he has cancer, he will have chemotherapy. His life is at risk. I don’t know what else to do but just hug him. I was mumbling, “Pree, it’s okay, it’s okay… Kaya ra ni nato… We can do this paree.. A lot of people care for you, for us… Be strong…” Mumbles, but really, I wasn’t just assuring him, I was also talking to myself.

My heart was heavy when he said, "Sorry pree ha.. nga sick ko.." And those words, behind the tears, is the unmasking of the ninja-- the selfless, humble, brave and loving ninja who thinks of others before him. There's nothing to be sorry about but Lito is that kind of person-- he doesn't want to ask a lot from others, he doesn't want to be a bother. He's so used to giving a lot of himself that it takes a lot of getting used to when he'd be the one asking for help. Told him that this time, I will be spoiling him so all he has to do is get better fast fast fast! There's nothing to be sorry about being sick. There's a lot to be thankful about. Life. Purpose. Courage. Love. A matter of perspective. I said before, life is always about choices. As much as we could, we will choose the brighter side of things.

There’s always sunshine after the rain. Cliché, yes. But still true. Let the rain fall, let the pain strike. I believe that we can appreciate the sun more if we get wet in the rain. Along life’s gloom, God surprises us with a little light to help us get through the day. These are some surprises today, and we thank each and every one behind these for giving us hope, encouragement and love.

- A stranger texted me and called me and said that she doesn’t know me and Lito, we just have a mutual friend. But she just wants to help. True enough, she said that there will be donors coming over and even Congressman Osmena helped in the search for that rare O-. You know who you are so thank you. Thank you as well to that mutual friend.

- Saw my iSTORYAn friends John Jay and Norman for a moment and I got to have a few laughs.

-Made friends with the very accommodating and understanding staff in Chong Hua Blood Bank and the nurses at our floor, even the cleaners and the food attendants.

-Got a chance to talk to some friends and relatives over the phone who consoled us, plus FB messages, emails, texts of support and referrals from friends and relatives all over the world

-Friends who suffer other forms of cancer has been constantly giving us support by telling us real-to-life experiences and what Lito should expect, giving us inspiration to move on. Thank you, you guys know who you are.

-Friends grouping together for that one lengthy phone call for Lito. He wished though he’s with you guys, He’s happy you called.

-Lito laughed so hard a few minutes after he cried just because he saw a link forwarded by a friend about Autocorrects -> http://damnyouautocorrect.com/13603/the-25-funniest-autocorrects-of-dyacs-first-year/

-Another donor passed as of this writing (11:00pm).

Sun streaks. Angels. Surprises. God is good.

Day 2 ends in 5minutes. But the battle is still on. The ninja just realized that he has a very big one ahead of him but that doesn’t mean he’s defeated. He's just getting acquainted with the fight and slowly accepting things. In fact, a friend of ours told us, tears cleanse the eyes and soul. With a smile on his face after the tears and few hearty laughs at that, we’re off to Day 3, his first day of chemotherapy. Ninja masks on, together with life’s little surprises and God’s battle of angels disguised as friends and strangers, gloomy days will always pass and give way for brighter ones. With that, we’re going to kick this Big C’s ass off! Hayyahhh!